So I went to see the therapist I was seeing last spring. I really truly like her and knew after my experience with the Psychiatrist at the Bariatric Center, I had to get back on the horse and see someone I liked and trusted.
It was a good decision. We spent the time talking about the Bariatric experience and she reassured me that how the Psychiatrist made me feel wasn't ok. We processed that and we talked about ways in which I could improve my quality of life, especially with this incredible surgery coming around the bend. We talked about Positive Self Talk. I told her that I've tried it a million times but that every time I try, the evil voice in the back of my head will make fun of my Positive Talk Self. So.....we changed it around a bit and this week I've been trying to practice Realistic Self Talk. So instead of saying, "I'm lazy..." I say things like, I'm really busy and exhausted. I get up at 4:30 to go to work for 6:30 and I work til 4:00 and the have to drive an hour home, then do homework with Izzy and then cook dinner and then correct papers. I don't have a lot of extra time....and even though I could put more thought into house work....I'm not lazy.
I've been trying this but after a pretty trying vacation week where I didn't get enough sleep (long story) and I ate like shit...I feel like I'm back to baseline. So I have another appointment with her on Wednesday. I'm going to get healthy one way or another....I'm just glad I have the support system I have.
My follow up from my endoscopy as been moved until Friday the 13th. So, just 2 more weeks until I move into another step of the process!! Wooohooo...movin' on up!
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